That One Morning

I still remember the first time I woke up with you. It was the best morning ever, I murmured. But you were still sleeping so you didn’t hear. But from that moment on, I knew. The universe and that beautiful sunset knew, that I was madly in love with you. I could still trace your sleeping face, your laugh lines. I can still hear your breathing, and the way your eyes fluttered when they finally opened, Oh! How beautiful they are! You asked me why was I awake so early, 3 AM to be exact. I just smiled. But if words were possible that time, this would have been my reply:

                “Because I want to enjoy a silent and private moment with you, I want to see you in your most vulnerable just to make sure that something like you could really exist. I want to memorize you, paint you, and put a picture of you where I can visit you whenever I want. A place only I know where, a place where nobody owns you but me. I want to listen to your beating heart; I want to hear the song that it plays because it puts my heart at ease. I woke up early because I want to remember this moment; you and I, a breath apart. Because I know that when the sun is at its highest, you wouldn’t be mine, that we will be life apart. That the song your heart is playing would be for someone else.”

But instead of saying it all, I chose to smile because it’s the easiest way to hide everything, even pain.

From then on, my heart was reduced to nothing but a thing that wants it all to happen again. My heart has been screaming your name. My heart has been looking, waiting and wanting to hear that song again. And I guess this would go on for a long time, maybe forever. I pity my heart.

Good thing I have enough to get by. For I still remember that one morning like it was just yesterday. I still remember your face; I can still trace your laugh lines. I can still recall how your eyes fluttered when you woke up. I can still remember the song your heart was playing. Lastly, I still have that picture of us that night. It was just you and I, a breath apart.