By now, it should be obvious how in love I am with beaches. Funny though, as I am not fond of swimming in the sea. I find it scary that the deeper I go the less I see. What I do love is sitting on the sand, watching the sun set, feeling the breeze, and listing to the sound of the waves crashing on the shore. Writing this now, I almost want to leave the office and go to where the land meets the sea. So yeah.
Today's feature is the town of Tabuelan up north. It was my first time visiting that part of Cebu, I am already planning to go back. As always, the sapphire waters, the salty cool breeze, and the fine white sand got me mesmerized. I was so dazed epiphanies started popping out of nowhere.
It's not the years the count
The reason why I was able to visit Tabuelan is because a friend recently had his heart broken. A 9 year old relationship, ended. Just the though of it is shudder inducing enough already. Imagine spending 9 years of your life with someone, then wake up one day and everything is over. As someone who is a bit wary of being in a relationship (though I crave for it), listening to my friend made me question whether I really want to be in one. It made me remember a line from the movie The Love of Siam:
If we can love someone so much how will be able to handle it, the one day when we are separated? And, if being separated is part of life, and you know about separation well, is it possible that we can love someone and never be afraid of losing them? At the same time, I was also wondering, is it possible that we can live our entire life with out loving anyone at all?
Exactly. How?
Empty Walls and Unfinished Business
One of the sights that really caught my attention (aside from the beach) is the ruins of what seemed to be an unfinished resort. There is something unsettlingly beautiful about the ruins. Imagine looking at empty walls and empty halls, overgrown grass against dirty concrete floors, while the sky changes from crimson sunset to deep blue night. It's sad and beautiful.
I imagine someone looking at his vast property, busy with construction workers eager to finish a passion project. His hopes, sky high as concrete structures slowly rise from the ground. Only to be disappointed, destroyed as his dream gets crushed my an unseen force called life.
While the ruins did remind me of despair, disappointment, and melancholy, I can't help but feel hopeful. Here I am standing in someone's what-could-have-been, looking at unfinished villas that was once someone's what-if. But the fact that something is still standing despite the overgrown grass painted by time, means something. Hope is not entirely lost. Something can be done. Hope is just hiding between the empty walls of this unfinished business. Just waiting to be found.
Solitude
I enjoy being with myself as much as I enjoy being in a company. I don't think there is anything wrong with being alone with yourself. I honestly enjoy watching a movie alone, either in my room or in a movie theater. I can eat alone in a resto. There things I'd rather do by myself. There are times that I'd rather be alone. Sometimes, I feel like I've spread my energy all over the place that I need some time alone to recuperate and function properly again. Do you feel the same too?
I wish people could stop generalizing and assuming that you're lonely when you're alone.
Had I been more careful of my alcohol intake, I would have enjoyed the trip more. But I was already drunk and asleep at around 6PM. So our final lesson for today is to never take what you can't handle. Most especially alcoholic beverages.
That's about it guys. I've been trying to finish this blog for the longest time and I can't seem to find the will to. I still have a lot on my drafts and I plan on posting them soon. Hope you're still reading. Have good one!
Cheers!
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