How I'm Spending My Six Days Off: Day 1

A few days ago, I made a rather bold and impulsive decision: I submitted my letter of resignation. I thought I was ready to pursue something else (like show business). But few minutes after, I started having second thoughts. Which is not that surprising, given that I am a walking and talking inconsistency. Good thing my ever supportive supervisor (and occasional editor/proofreader) approved my four days worth of vacation leave. On my first day, I spent the entirety morning cooking breakfast and hopelessly taking a badass flat lay shot. I realise I don't have enough creativity to do it; my fried rice wont cooperate. Instead, I browsed through my old files (like 2012 old) and found this story I will be sharing with you today.

The story was supposed to be a series I think, as the file says "Chapter One". It was titled Ashes and Wine (Yeah I know what you're thinking. It was written way back 2012 when my maturity is that of a 5 year old and I was full of teenage drama, issues, and angst). Disregarding my lack of proper grammar (I'd like to think that I've improved), I'm actually impressed that I was able to conjure such prose. And because I'm a kind-hearted heartthrob, I decided to share it with you guys. 

I know I should have edited the story a bit. I should have made my subjects agree with their respective verbs, put my time travelling tenses in their respective eras, paralleled the shit out of my verbs, and a lot more. But at the same time, something in me feels like it's better to keep the errors, no matter how many and cringe-inducing they are. There's this nostalgic feel about what I wrote and I intend to keep it that way. I know it's not a good excuse, especially for a supposed writer like me, but what the hell. So without further ado, here is the unedited chapter one of Ashes and Wine. Enjoy.

Probably the last chapter as well. 

I was reading silently, sipping every now and then a bitter coffee I have ordered. I thought then, that it is a lovely day: a cup of coffee, a little drizzle of rain, a good book, almost my nirvana. 

Then you came.

But like any other instances where I see someone so perfectly beautiful, I ignored you. And I swear, every atom of my being was resisting. But I have mastered the art of not caring so much that sometimes its scary, but most of the time it's a blessing, but that day, my inner self is torn in two.

You ordered, Earl Grey tea and a slice blueberry cheesecake and I was like, Ugh, the gods of Olympus are getting funnier everyday. But I have my mask on so I couldn't careless. But lo and behold, the coffee shop is quite full and everyone is with someone, well, except for me, so you slowly walked towards me, and I feel my breathe getting heavier with every step.

"Hi, it's kinda full, can I sit here?"

I looked around and managed a pathetic surprised face.

"Oh! Yeah sure..."

That was the most awkward 5 minutes of my life. I know you are itching to start a conversation, and so was I. In my head, I was already criticizing you. And while I drink your every flaw, you munch on your cheesecake. You look like an award winning movie honestly. Once again I blame the higher beings for creating creatures like you. Why must the likes of you exist?

"Lang Leav eh, is she any good?" I almost feel from my chair, can't you see, you beautiful being that I am concentrating on you?

"Uhh, define good?" is all I could mutter.

"What does she write about I mean?"

"Poems mostly"

"Oh, I thought its one of those vampire love stories, or those move-heaven-and-hell love stories"

"I am very offended, do I look like I read those stuff?"

"I'm sorry, I was just trying to be funny, try to loosen up a little bit.."

"I could say the same for your shirt but I kept quiet about it..."

"What is wrong with my shirt?"

Fuck, so I said it out loud. Fuck my brain and my mouth, they always make tandem.

"Nothing, Drink your tea and eat your cake"

And you just smiled and took a fork full of your damned cheesecake. Then there was silence for about two minutes. I wanted to leave, but my body is against it. I am not reading anymore, I was just thinking of where would this lead. Its cute, whats happening. But I am allergic to cute things happening. I remember my friend once, saying that of all the hopeless romantic she knows, I am the coldest.

"Look I'm sorry, I was just being friendly, sorry if I offended you.."

"Its fine, sorry for snapping too, am just not good with strangers"

"Well, let's not be strangers then, I'm.."

"Hold it... no names, were just two people enjoying this coffee shop. My coffee will soon be finished and I will leave by then so I don't think its any important that we get to know each other"

"Wow, life has ruined you huh"

"That is offensive but true so I'll let it pass, and yeah, life fucked me hard its almost rape"

And you laughed so hard the whole shop looked at you, at us. And I feel myself turn red as your kissable lips. I have never liked attention, and I almost wanted to punch you so hard, but I was not raised in a violent way so I didn't.

"You know you are very funny, harsh but funny.."

"Thank you, take great pride in my humor.."

And then we talked about everything. We argued about politics, religion, entertainment, art and life in general. I love it, and to be honest, I am loving you a little each banter we make. It a world where everyone is so obsessed with how they look and little with what they are, its very rare to find someone with so much substance as you. I took it as a sign, that you are the one I am looking for, for a very long time now. And I will not end this day with what ifs and could have beens just like the ones that came before you.

"Hey, we already consumed three cups of coffee each, it will be insomnia for two days"

"Yeah, so I guess we should go home now" I hated saying that, even more for suggesting we end this wonderful day turned into a wonder night, to end.

"Not really, I have this unopened bottle of wine in my place, want to take a sip"

"As long as its good for the heart..."

To be continued.....

What do you think? Am I the next E.L James of what? Comment below and let me know. You might win yourself a copy of the book I'm never going to write. 


  1. Oh WOW!! Please don't let this be the last chapter ♥

  2. I want a copy please. T.T sorry just read this today as well haha