Status: Early Semi Quasi-Quarter-life Crisis

Title is a bit #Mouthful, which happens to be my name in prison. Kidding.

If this was Sims 3, I would have cheated the fuck out this and change my life aspiration. Sadly, this is real life and I am torn between what I want to do and job security.

Nevermind the absence of romance in my life. I buried that idea together with my frustrations of being an artista. My biggest dilemma as of late is career related. For one, I think it proves how I have come a long way in terms of maturity. On the other hand, thinking of switching careers in your mid-twenties discredit the former. Which, is utterly confusing. Am I making sense?

Nowadays, I would always spend a good 20 minutes deciding whether I will show up for work, just be late, or call in sick. Of course, my financial needs will always prevail, so I drag myself out of bed and prepare. Other times, I just give up fighting (like today). Its not that I am lazy, or that I’d rather spent my entire life lazing around. It sounds like a good idea, feasible, but impractical. I want to work. I want to earn and live a good life. I want to give my Mom everything that she deserves, which is a lot judging from all her sacrifices for me. At the same time, I want to pursue my passion. I want a job that I can enjoy. 

Like, for starters, I want to be an artista. Not just an ordinary artista, I want to be an award winning artista. I use the term artista because actor is too two dimensional. Artista in my country is not limited to acting. I can be a model, a director, an author, a blogger, a singer, a dancer and of course, a politician. My friends laugh whenever I mention my desire of being one, while saying that I’m funny and I should stop drinking. What they don’t know is that I get hurt when they laugh at my dreams and tell me to stop drinking.

I also want to be a writer/author. I have all these plots and stories I want to share. I think people will be inspired. Imagine a poorly proofread, proper grammar deprived book being published. Who wouldn’t be inspired, write right?

I also dream of being a director. Ugh, the thoughts of making world class porn movies! Imagine breathing life to the Filipino epic Biag ni Lam-ang starring Coco Martin and Liza Soberano! Shudder inducing thoughts, truly!

Lastly, I want to be a singer. I want to have chart-topping albums. I want to re-record hits of previous chart topping singers. I want to do acoustic covers of the entire Billboard Top 100. I may not have an impressive voice but that is what auto-tune is for. For the doubters, I have two words: Marketing and PR

See? I have everything figured out had this been a perfect world. If only I can rewrite my life and choose any career mentioned above, it would truly be awesome. Until then, I am stuck with a 9-5 (5-3:30 really, you know BPO, but for dramatic purposes)

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